I’m pretty sure if I keep dominating with my picks I can get the girl on the left to be my girlfriend, so I got that going for me me which is nice. And gambling is legal is Las Vegas, so it looks like it’s a match made in heaven.
Pittsburgh +3.5 vs Miami
Boston College +4 vs Virginia Tech
Arkansas +7 vs Alabama
Notre Dame +4.5 vs Stanford
California +7 vs Arizona
Nevada -4 vs BYU
South Carolina +3 vs Auburn
Last Week 6-2-1
Season 15-4-2
Editor’s Note - Donnie, THG’s Old Blackhawk Writer, is back to get to talk the state of College Athletics
Am I the only person in the fucking world who thinks that paying college athletes is completely ridiculous? Recently, there have been a number of college athletic programs under investigation because their dumbass players are accepting gifts and money from agents and boosters. Reggie Bush has been exiled from USC and has since forfeited his Heisman Trophy. The craziest part of this whole scenario is that college athletes in general seem to be getting the benefit of the doubt. This is not to say that there aren’t blood sucking agents out there, but don’t tell me that the players have not been well educated on how to handle these situations accordingly. Don’t tell me the solution is to pay college athletes in order to curtail their inclination to accept improper benefits. Do these kids have no sense of accountability in this? I, for one, am fed up with the notion that big time college athletes should be monetarily compensated. People continue to endorse this and now the athletes themselves are jumping on the bandwagon. Now, I understand that it is only a few individuals who are hurting the reputation of the whole. I know people who played division one college sports who are, to this day, some of my best friends and continue to exude character traits that I strive to attain. However, this topic has gotten out of control and my temperature continues to rise as people constantly support this idea. Here are nine reasons illustrating my opposition:
Guy is fucking everywhere. Talking about football on some ESPN special, in the pregame booth, at every game every weekend. What team does he even root for? Or is he one of those assholes that says he just loves all of college football. Fucking guy, get off my TV screen, I’m trying to check out Orlando Pace’s sweet tits.
Yawn, just another week at The Hot Glove pick em department. 6-1-1 in the first week of college football is just standard operating procedure over here. With NFL kicking off tonight too, The Hot Glove will be printing money all weekend long. Here are this week’s picks:
Mississippi St. +2.5 vs Auburn - Mississippi St. has a passing game now to go along with the best rushing offense in the SEC in last year.
South Carolina -3 vs Georgia - Georgia without their two best offensive players, I’ll stick with the Ole Ball Coach
Vanderbilt +10 vs LSU - LSU could barely beat UNC’s JV team last week.
Notre Dame -4 vs Michigan - Notre Dame will be looking for revenge after last year’s 4th quarter collapse. Michigan can’t throw the ball and Notre Dame’s front 7 are underrated.
Ohio St. -9 vs Miami - I’m a big believer in the Buckeyes, that is until they travel to Camp Randall
Oklahoma -8 vs Florida St. - So what if Oklahoma only beat Utah St. by 7, this team will make a name for themselves this week.
Last Week 6-1-1
Season 6-1-1
Editors Note - Now that football is back we’re running picks columns on Thursday (College) and Friday (NFL). As much as I would love to give you my stellar College picks, I’d rather not see all my friends go broke. So we’re bringing in a college guru, friend of The Hot Glove, Danimal. If he steers you wrong blame him, if he steers you right remember what blog you read it on.
College football kicks off tonight which means all you degenerate gamblers out there (Big Cat) can stop betting on preseason NFL games. As a former backup free safety for an average high-school football team, I’ve got some inside information you squares out there have never heard of. I’m pretty much John “The Million Dollar Man” Anthony with my college football plays. Let’s get to it:
South Carolina -14 vs Southern Mississippi - Always go with the Ole Ball Coach
Pittsburgh +3 vs Utah - Watch out for this Jonathan Baldwin kid.
Illinois +12 vs Missouri - This point spread has been falling faster than Obama’s approval rating. Boom, TheHotGlove continues to be the most hard hitting political blog on the net. Plus Mizzou’s starting Running back went all Big Ben on his girlfriend so he’s suspended.
Notre Dame -11.5 vs Purdue - Golden Domer’s are back. For this week at least.
Michigan -3 vs Connecticut - Plus, Rich Rod openly breaks the rules and doesn’t give a shit, I can respect that.
Kansas St -2.5 vs UCLA - Favorite play of the weekend. KSU’s running back might be smaller than Snooki, but he has more moves than Ronnie after housing a pitcher full of Ron Ron Juice.
LSU -1.5 vs UNC - Half off UNC’s starting defense is on the practice squad for following in Reggie Bus’s footsteps and LSU has a kid Russell Sheppard that makes Joshua Cribbs look slow.
Virgina Tech +2.5 vs Boise St. - No way the Bronco defense can handle Va Tech’s running backs
PS
Yeah I know this is way too many games to play the first weekend, but I need to raise money fast so I can import a couple of drunk South African monkeys to hang out with. Just picture your boy Danimal walking into the bars with Mr. Teeny and Dr. Zaius. Not gonna serve me another shot of rumplemintz, how about Mr. Teeny gouges out your eyes. Won’t let me in cause I’m too drunk, Dr. Zaius will throw feces all over you until you wise up. Plus these bets will knock your bookie out.
As with most college football preseason rankings, defending national champion Alabama is on top. The Tide placed No. 1 again with 55 first place votes, as Nick Saban, Mark Ingram and the gang rev up for a repeat. Their first test comes against No. 14 ranked Penn State on September 11.
The only other team to get first place votes is Ohio State, ranked No. 2. The college football preseason rankings have the Buckeyes so high after they finally broke through in the BCS last year. With Heisman favorite Terrelle Pryor, the Buckeyes are favored to do even more. But they also have a big early test, against No. 13 Miami at home, also on September 11.
The rest of the top five in the first college football preseason rankings have more question marks. Florida is at No. 3, despite losing Tim Tebow and despite the uncertainty around Urban Meyer. Texas is No. 4, despite losing Colt McCoy and despite losing in last year’s title game. And Boise State is up to No. 5, with heavy expectations to finally break the BCS title game glass ceiling.
The top 10 is rounded out by Virginia Tech, TCU, Oklahoma, Nebraska and Iowa. The Sooners had a disappointing year last season, but are counted on to rise back up, even without Sam Bradford. The Cornhuskers are approaching their last year in the Big 12, and hope to go out with a bang, despite not having Ndamukong Suh.
In the rest of the college football preseason rankings, Oregon and Wisconsin lead the last 15. Florida State is at No. 20, in their first year without Bobby Bowden.
Let me hit you with some stone cold facts for a second.
Fact - From 2002-2003 one hundred percent of the national champions in college football were ranked between 12-15 in the preseason poll.
Now youre probably saying what the fuck does this all mean. Well let me throw a little more knowledge your way.
Fact - 2010 = 2 + 0 + 10 = 12
And guess who is ranked #12 in this years preaseason poll, the spot that churns out national championships like clockwork, that’s right, The University of Wisconin-Madison.
Its time folks, this is the Badger’s year. I feel it deep in my plums. John Clay will win the Heisman finishing first by 3 votes ahead of runner up Scott Tolzien and the Badgers will kick the shit out of everyone they line up against.
Book it, Badgers will be raising that glass egg come the first week in January, its fucking destiny.
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